What Parents Should Not Talk About Before Kids

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Freelancing parentsParenthood is not very easy, it is a work of responsibility and one should maintain full honesty. There are several beliefs and misconceptions about bringing up a child. But most of them are found to lead to ineffective results. They also lead to ill communication between the parents and the children. Some parents use authoritarian parenting strategies but that is actually not the right thing to do. This is because it submerges the child’s point of view and further in life they get scared away from taking control of situations. Again if you are following an overly permissive parenting then that will not teach the students about self-control and limit themselves when needed. So, the things that you should be avoiding to tell them are discussed in the following points.

Comparing Them with Their Siblings

Telling them that their siblings are better than them in education or other activities and asking why they aren’t like them is wrong. It grows jealousy towards their siblings. In some cases, the child even becomes furious and lands up hurting the siblings. Saying this also makes them feel left out by the parents. It makes the child feel that they are a failure in everything.

Saying They Are Negative

Saying “You are bad!” to your child fills your child with negative thoughts. This lowers their self-esteem. As kids are innocent they believe in the goodness of things. Keep them happy, positive and good. If they do something wrong never tell them that they are bad. In fact, if you give them positive comments, there are more chances that they will never let you down. Teaching the children about right and wrong will let them distinguish between good and bad things.

Saying “No” Straightaway

Saying “No” to the little ones is rude. If they always hear “no” they are going to lose all hopes. So, instead of saying a “no” directly consider saying something alternative in a polite manner. Like, you can ask them to speak softly instead of saying “No shouting” and the like.

Avoiding Talking To Them

It is always good to keep the channel of communication between you and your child active. Never ask your children stop talking with you. Instead, let them share their feelings and opinions with you. If you want to give them your advice you must be talking to them. You must be having a polite and convincing tone so that they do buy your advice at some point or the other.

Discouraging Them on Their Capabilities

Never feed your child with comments like “You cannot do it!” This would give a jolt to their self-confidence. Give them a chance but make sure that it doesn’t hurt them in any way. Maybe they would not get through in the first attempt but they will definitely learn through trials and errors. But if you discourage them then they will not try anything new.

Making Gender Biased Comments

We often get to hear people saying that girls do not do this or these are the right things for boys. Well, this comment separates them from one another on the basis of gender. Let the innocent kids be like they are and decide what they want to be in their life rather than we forcing our opinions on them.

Complain About Them to Others

This is a common mistake which most parents make. Telling your kids that you are going to complain about them to their teacher or their dad instills a feeling of fear in them. Fear can prevent them from accepting mistakes and hide away their feelings. So, do not make it an everyday situation for the kids. Instead, make the child confess their mistakes on their own by freely discussing their mistakes.

Never Make Them Feel Unwanted

Do not say that “No one wants a child like you!” This hurts them and they feel unwanted and deprived of your love. Instead, love them and make them feel that they are your only priority so that they have a sound growth of their personality.

As a parent, you might not be in the right mood always. So, you might speak something unintentionally. It would be difficult for the little ones to get complicated emotions. Children take everything seriously. So, that will have a negative impact while growing their personality.

Contributed By: https://www.myprivatetutor.sg/

A post by Yvonne (5 Posts)

Yvonne is author at LeraBlog. The author's views are entirely his/her own and may not reflect the views and opinions of LeraBlog staff.
Yvonne Sim is freelance private tutor since 2003. She completed her Masters from SIM University, Singapore. She writes daily and publishes articles to help people know about the trends of education and learning. She writes for MyPrivateTutor Singapore. She strives to positively influence the youth about how to make the most of education as well as co-carricular activities.

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